Rugged man story!
by once-upon-a-dream012
Summary: This story is an epic Adventure between Rocklee and Naruto to find Rocklee's dog which holds super secret Jutsu. My dad came up with this idea and I thought it was hilarious, so on his idea this is it. Review if you want chapter 2


**_Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto _**

**_Enjoy this rugged man story. _**

**_Warning: This story is EPIC and is only for the ELITIST PEOPLE, IF YOU CANT HANDLE AWESOME-NESS I SUGGEST YOU GET A WIMPY STORY. _**

**_:) my dad came up with the general idea, this is an epic adventure, enjoy.. _**

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Rocklee woke up to an eery silence, normally his dog, Mitsu would wake him up by now.

Throwing his legs over the bed, he called out "Mitsu!!"

"..." No bark

"Mitsu...?"

"...."

He searched around the house, maybe he got out

Thinking quickly he went on Craigs list.

**_"Selling one of a kind dog, very rare, and it knows secret Jutsu."_**

Rocklee started getting angry, some guy stole his dog and then has the balls to sell it online?

He put on some shoes and ran over to Naruto's house.

"Naruto! someone stole Mitsu!"

Naruto knew how important that dog was, and how it couldn't get in the wrong hands.

"Some dude is selling her on Craigs list."

Naruto yelled "Lets go after her!"

Once they packed two backpacks filled with supplies they headed off into the forest after a couple of hours, Naruto said "Hey, lets go to sleep"

Rocklee couldn't agree more.

They packed everything and were ready to go but a man hopped out of the trees.

He was a big man, he had dirty green hair, avaiater goggles on.

His outfit consisted of Mechanics overalls with the name Lag written on it, they were obviously stolen, the Sleeves and legs were cut off to accomadate his bulging muscles, and lastly he had an epic creature around his neck that could have only been conseived in the balls of satan..

"Give me your money."

Naruto drew a line with his shoe, "I wont give you anything, you will have to beat us"

Viper Vince laughed "You fools! do you actually think you could beat me? I just drank a liter of Genuine Totally awesome sweet alabama liquid snake."

"Naruto, I got this." Rocklee said after a moment of silence

Rocklee stepped forward getting ready to strike.

"Cock bite jutsu!" He hissed like gaboon viper and threw his hands in the air.

The large snake slithered down from his body and into the earth.

before Rocklee could move out the way, the viper bit him.

As the Gaboon Viper completed the Cock bite jutsu it felt like 4 hot pokers shooting threw his genitalia.

Rocklee cried out in pain and collapsed onto the ground

Viper Vince smiled to himself "Ah, in just one week he will be dead."

Naruto yelled "Why is he going to die?"

"The venom from my snakes is deadly, a slow acting venom."

"You bastard"

Naruto was ready to attack "Shadow clone Jutsu!"

10 naruto's appeared and were in fighting stance.

Viper vince laughed "Multi-tacular dagger fang jutsu"

now he had 11 snakes, "Cock Bite Jutsu!" he did the hand movements and all th snakes attacked.

Naruto was quick to react he did a substitiution jutsu and threw 3 kunai at the larger snake.

which killed it, Naruto beat up viper vince and right before he did the finishing move he said "Whats the cure?"

"T-t-t-the cure?"

Naruto was getting angry his friend was dying and this guy wasnt going to give him the cure "Whats the cure to the poison?"

"There is no cure, you have to suck it out."

"B-but you bit him.." Naruto freaked out "Im not gunna suck the poison out of him! are you insane!"

"Then let him die." and after that he slipped into unconciousness.

Naruto waited for Rocklee to wake up "Arrrrrg!" Rocklee screamed when he woke up.

Naruto was sitting quietly next to him "Rocklee, there is only one way to stop the poison from spreading.."

Rocklee was excited, the pain in his gentetalia might be going away soon.

"Someone has to suck it out.." Naruto spoke in a whisper

"HELL NO, let me die."

Naruto piped up "Im not going to do it, but we need to find someone who can."

Naruto lifted the teen up and started walking, after hours of walking they were in need of food and water, Naruto pointed out a house and walked up to it.

He set Rocklee down on his feet and knocked on the door, as soon as it opened Naruto elbowed Rocklee

"Maybe they could help with your problem."

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**Well Review, its funny.**


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